Thursday, February 20, 2014
Support is here!
We started our birthday card plea for Logan out of a desire to get extended family on board in celebrating him. How do you change Grandma's view of disability? How do you prevent yourself from crying when you see her treating your "typically developing" children better? Subtle things become thorns in your side. Why? Is this a simply a generational "norm"? Or is she ashamed of our son Logan? Could it be that she just lost on where to start in developing a relationship with her disabled grandson, and it is just easier to ignore him? As a mom, I need the support from extended family! Logan needs that relationship with his grandma. Doctor appointments, never ending school meetings, late evening online research for hours, sleepless nights rubbing his tummy and trying to help ease his excruciating gastrointestinal pain, and trying to create a sense of normalcy for my husband and younger children too. I crave the support from extended family- without it I just feel so alone. Oftentimes, I just need a soft place to fall at the end of one of these days. My son knows that I will never treat him differently. Regardless of where Grandma stands on the issue- I need to be an anchor for him- for my other kids. They need to SEE that we treat everyone (differences or not) equally! Even though Logan is non verbal and severely autistic, I want him to look and be treated like other kids his age. If they are wearing a certain style- i.e. yellow skinny jeans with short spiked hair... that's what he will do as well. I want so badly for him to be treated with respect, and valued as a person- by more than just his mom! Weather he "understands" or not about back-to-school new clothes shopping... I will be in line for him just like I will for my other kids. He counts! As for Grandma... I am treating Logan exactly the same as my other kids in front of her. I emphasize it regularly. Out of the THOUSANDS of cards we have received for Logan... we are still waiting for one from his Grandma. We are very blessed now to have so much support from 1/2 the world. We do not feel alone anymore. We are supported, and Logan's birthday counts!